Hidden Thoughts
by Hottieluvr
Summary: Jenny had found the love of her life but knew he would never think of her in that way. A girl can dream though. Nate had found the love of his life, only he didn't know it. He knew he was interested but he also knew he couldn't pursue her. She was Dan's little sister.
1. Chapter 1

Hidden Thoughts

Jenny had been sitting at her sewing machine daydreaming again about the man that had been in her thoughts since the day she accidentally ran into him literally. He had helped her pick up the books she had dropped and actually talked to her. She thought about the night she sat with him on the steps when he should have been at Blair's birthday party. She couldn't believe he had been so open with her, even showing her the ring his parents wanted him to give to Blair. She knew she didn't have a chance with him but it doesn't hurt a girl to dream, she thought as she smiled to herself. He was way out of her league, and she knew he only thought of her as Dan's little sister. She sighed to herself and went back to concentrating on the gown she was making for the costume ball.

Later she was getting ready for bed and took a shower. She put her little baby doll pajama gown on and decided to head for the kitchen for a late night snack. Figuring she was alone she didn't bother to put on a robe.

Dan and Nate had arrived to the Humphrey place. Nate was going to be staying with them for awhile since Dan really didn't have a place to go at the time.

"Are you sure this is going to be okay", Nate asked.

"Yeah man. It's fine. Dad is cool you only have to deal with putting up with my bratty sister."

"Jenny." Nate said softly.

"Yeah, I hope she doesn't get on your nerves or anything."

"I'm sure she won't". Nate said thinking about the night they talked on the steps. He remembered how sweet she was and how her hair smelled when she hugged him before she left. She was so tiny and soft. She had smelled so good. He had to shake his head to get rid of his thoughts. "She is Dan's little sister" he thought to himself. "off limits."

"Hey man, I will be right back. I'm going to go and pick our subs up from the deli. You will be okay here?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine. I'll just get my things put away so they aren't cluttering everything up."

"Okay. Be right back." Dan said as he grabbed his jacket and left.

Nate was sitting there after he had put his things out of the way. He heard a noise and looked up. What he saw made his heart beat fast. He watched as Jenny had come into the kitchen in her pajamas, if that's what you called them. He knew he shouldn't just stare and should make himself known but he was trying his best to get his libido in check before he did. He watched as she opened the refrigerator door and then lean down into it before she pulled something out and then watched some more as she got a spoon and dipped it into the pint of ice cream she held in her hand. He knew he had to turn away when he watched her put the spoon in her mouth. He turned back around when he heard the front door open. He realized then that Jenny had left for her room. He breathed a sigh of relief, at least he thinks it is relief.

"Here you go." Dan said not seeing the flushed and embarrassed look Nate had on his face.

They ate and talked and then it was time to go to bed.

Nate lay there awake for a long time. He couldn't get the picture of Dan's little sister out of his head.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Jenny woke up the next morning and put her robe on. She wanted to get a head start on the day. She walked into the kitchen, this time with a robe on covering her. When she realized she was the only one up she decided to start breakfast for her brother and her dad. Once it was done she knocked on Dan's door and yelled that breakfast was ready. Then she turned to wake up her dad before jumping in the shower.

"Does she always make breakfast for you guys?" Nate asked smiling as he took a bite of the pancakes.

"We change off every now and then. Usually it's dad."

"Well these are awesome." Nate replied.

They both looked up when they heard Jenny come out of the bathroom. She wasn't paying attention and was talking to Dan about different things as she was going about trying to find something to wear.

"Dan, could you tell me if this looks okay? I want to look really good today." she said yelling out from her bedroom.

"Why do you want to look so good today?" he yelled back.

"I know you don't understand and I know he would never be interested but I would really like for Na...oh hi Nate, I didn't know you were here." she said then realizing she didn't have any make up on she went running back to her room.

Dan started laughing knowing who it was she wanted to notice her.

"What was that all about?" Nate turned to Dan confused.

"Oh uh.. nothing man. It was nothing." Dan said still laughing.

Nate looked towards the way Jenny had ran with thoughts going through his head. He couldn't believe that the girl who had just been standing there was more beautiful then ever. "Who is she wanting to look good for?" he wondered. He felt a twinge of jealousy and he couldn't figure out why.

Jenny was almost hyperventilating once she got to her room. Her face was flushed and she had never been this embarrassed before."why didn't Dan tell her he was there?" she wondered. She went about getting dressed trying not to think about the fact that the one guy she wanted most ever had just seen her in no make up and she had almost told him how she felt without realizing it. She heard Dan yell out they were ready to leave and she gave one last look in the mirror. She walked out to greet them making sure to not look Nate in the eyes. She didn't think she could ever look at him again.

Nate tried his best to keep from stealing glances at Jenny. But he kept finding his gaze on her anyways. They arrived at school and before he knew it Vanessa, his girlfriend was wrapping her arms around him trying to give him a kiss. Trying to get Jenny out of his head he kissed Vanessa, wrapping her up in his arms. He never saw the sad look that came over Jenny's face.

"Alright you two, get a room." Dan said jokingly.

Nate pulled away feeling guilty for some reason. He glanced over at Jenny and she wouldn't look at him. He wondered why.

The rest of the day every time he seen Jenny she turned away. He wondered what he had done to make her angry at him. He was going to ask her when they got back home.

That evening he decided to get Jenny to talk to him, but she acted normal again so he figured she hadn't been angry at him, she must have been in a mood in general. They all laughed and joked at the table during dinner.

"Well, I hate to eat and run but I have a date with Serena. Nate are you going to be okay here with just my little sister for company?" Dan asked smiling.

"What?" both Nate and Jenny exclaimed.

"I have a date and Dad has to go to the gallery to work tonight. They are having some showing." Dan said.

"Oh, um.. sure. Nate do you like to play video games?" Jenny asked trying to sound nonchalant.

"Uh.. sure. Um.. we could do that." Nate said.

"Well then I guess we will be good." Jenny said to her brother.

"Okay then. See you two later." Dan said as he left.

Both Nate and Jenny were quiet for a moment then Jenny said, "So what games are you good at?"

Nate had been thinking and didn't understand what she meant. "Excuse me?" he asked.

"What game? You know video games."

"Oh, whatever you want Little J." he said not realizing he had given her a nickname.

"Little J?" she asked smiling.

"Oh, yeah, sorry. Jen."

"No, I like Little J." she said since he was the only one who called her that.

They got up to play the games and were having a good time. The score was pretty even as they had both won and lost to each other. Then Jenny yawned.

"Hey Little J, you should probably hit the sack."

"Yeah, I am tired. I couldn't sleep last night. I think I was up eating ice cream at about midnight." she laughingly said.

"I know." he whispered.

"You know, um.. how do you know"

"I saw you." he said.

"Oh." she said then started thinking about what she was wearing when he saw her. "OH. I am so embarrassed."

"Why?"

"I uh.. Well.."

"You looked good." he whispered once again.

Jenny's heart swelled but knew he was probably just saying that. She quickly changed the subject, "So I guess I will call it a night."

"Goodnight Little J."

"Goodnight." she said as she left the room. Not knowing that his eyes followed her to her room.

"I can't believe I said that to her." he said to himself. "What am I doing? I have a girlfriend. Nate, she is off limits. Remember that, OFF LIMITS". He said to himself once again.

Jenny lay in her bed with a smile on her face. She really liked the idea of Nate sleeping just down the hall from her. Her fantasy was still intact.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Jenny was sitting at her sewing machine once again. Since Serena had seen the dress she was making for the costume ball, she asked Jenny who it was for. Jenny didn't want anyone to know what her dressed looked like so she told Serena she had made it for her. Serena was so excited and since then Dan had been extra nice to her. It had been a week since the night her and Nate had played video games and she hadn't seen him much since then. Pretty much only in passing as the four of them went out on dates. Jenny would always try to stay cheerful as she watched him walk out the door knowing he was going to Vanessa. This is what found her sitting alone in the loft making her own gown once again. This time though she decided to make it in the color she loved the most. It was the color of Nates eyes. Every time she pulled out the material she thought about what it would be like to be Nates date. She had one more stitch and she was done. She held up the dress and breathed a sigh of relief. The ball was the next night.

Nate was trying his best to keep Jenny out of his thoughts. But the more he seem to try the more she was there. He knew that Vanessa could sense a change in him, he just didn't know what to say. He didn't want to hurt her and he knew he couldn't have Jenny. So he continued to date Vanessa. He knew it was wrong but he also knew he wouldn't be able to hide his feelings for Jenny if he didn't have Vanessa. So he had to keep trying to hide his true feelings from her. As he was getting dressed he thought back to the night before.

"Is anyone home?" he asked as he came into the loft. When he received no answer he put his bookbag down and walked closer to Jenny's room. He looked around getting a feel of who Jenny was. He walked closer to the sewing machine that he inevitably always seen her at. He picked up the cloth that she had tucked there and realized this was the material she was making her gown out of. He smiled knowing it would really bring the color of her eyes out. He then realized he heard water running and knew she was in the shower. He heard the water shut off so he hurriedly left her room while trying his best not to imagine her wet in the shower.

The next morning they were all sitting there eating breakfast and Jenny was trying to figure out why Nate couldn't look her in the face. Did she do something to make him angry? She wondered. She couldn't wait to get to school so she wouldn't have to watch him ignore her. She never realized before that her crush had turned into something more for Nate. Her heart broke just thinking about it. Why did she have to go and fall in love with the one guy who she could never have.

The day was finally over as well as the week. Tonight was the ball. Even with the way Nate was behaving towards her she couldn't help but be excited. No one was going to know who the girl with the teal dress was. She had told Dan she was going with friends so she could actually go there without anyone seeing her. She waited around for them to get dressed before she did. She was sitting at the breakfast bar eating an apple. She knew her dad would be home before she left and she was glad. He would be the first person to see her in her dress. She started to walk towards her room when the bathroom door opened. When she seen Nate come out with nothing but a towel around his waist she couldn't move. She stood there staring at him. She knew if she moved she would jump into his arms. Knowing she was embarrassing herself she still couldn't move.

"Little J." she heard him say softly. He could see the desire in her eyes and he couldn't help but smile. Finally he got a reaction out of her. He went to touch her face and it jarred her into action.

"I'm sorry." she said as she ran to her room. Nate watched as she ran off. Part of him was relieved because seeing her desiring him almost made him forget himself. Another minute and he knew he would have pulled her into his arms and kissed her.

"Jenny, we are leaving now." Dan yelled out to her.

"Okay." she replied.

Nate whispered something to Dan.

"Oh and there is a corsage in the refrigerator for you. Nate didn't want you to go to the ball without one."

"I didn't want you to tell her it was from me." Nate said quickly.

"Oh sorry." Dan.

"Tell Nate I said thank you." she yelled through the door.

She heard the door to the loft shut and knew they were gone. She took a deep breath and then proceeded to get dressed. Before leaving she went to the fridge. She pulled out the corsage and smiled. It was a good thing it was a wrist corsage. Putting it on her dress wouldn't have worked. She turned around as her dad came in the door.

"My girl is all grown up." he said smiling at her.

"Um.. yeah. I am 17 now."

"I know, it just seems like yesterday we were bringing you home from the hospital."

"Dad."

"Okay, I'll stop. You have fun baby girl. Remember if you need anything Dan will be there."

"I know." she said giving him a kiss on the cheek and leaving.

Jenny looked around at everyone at the ball. She had her mask on and knew noone knew who she was. She walked closer to where Dan, Serena, Nate and Vanessa were but not too close. She seen that Vanessa had on just about the same color as she did. She rolled her eyes and turned away, not seeing the two beautiful eyes watch as she stood there. He smiled to himself.

"Finally", he thought to himself. His intake of breath at her beauty was heard by Vanessa and Dan.

"You okay?" Vanessa asked.

"Yeah, I must have swallowed wrong". He said as he held up his glass.

"Oh, okay." Vanessa said as she pulled his hand tugging him to the dance floor. He danced with her as his eyes were held captive by Jenny.


	4. Chapter 4

Chpt 4

Jenny couldn't watch Nate dancing with Vanessa anymore. She decided to get herself a drink. Nate watched her go. He also watched as other guys watched her go. The anger felt like a fist to the stomach. He excused himself from Vanessa for a moment and followed Jenny. He found her in an area that was not as crowded. He knew what he wanted to do but he didn't know if he should. When he seen another guy come over to her and flirt he knew he had to. He walked over and grabbed her arm and led her away. Before she could say anything he turned her to him and kissed her. A long and soulful kiss. At first Jenny tried to pull away. Then she realized he thought she was Vanessa. That was why he was kissing her. So even though she knew she shouldn't she kissed him back. This might be the only time she could ever taste his lips. She felt his tongue slide over her lips and she opened them to him. Her knees became weak when she felt his tongue caress hers. His arms encircled her bringing her closer to him. As he pulled away and then kissed her neck near her ear, she heard him whisper, "Little J." and then he turned and left.

Jenny stood there in shock. What did this mean? She wondered to herself. He knew who she was and kissed her. She watched as he walked back to Vanessa, Dan and Serena. Then before she could turn away he looked up at her and smiled.

Jenny lay in her bed that night going over and over what happened. She didn't know what she was supposed to do now. Did this mean he liked her? If he did why was he with Vanessa?"She decided not to mull that over yet. She just wanted to go over in her head how could he tasted.

The rest of the night at the ball, Nate couldn't get the kiss out of his head. He knew she would taste sweet, he just didn't know how sweet. He was surprised he didn't feel guilty when he walked back towards Vanessa. He did feel somewhat bad that he knew he was going to hurt her. But after kissing Jenny he knew she was the girl for him. He wasn't going to go another day without her. As he was walking Vanessa home trying to figure out a way to tell her they were over he heard her say, "I saw you."

"What?" he said bringing his thoughts to her.

"I saw you kiss Jenny."

"Vanessa, I..."

"It's okay. I've known for awhile someone else had occupied your mind."

"I didn't mean for it to happen. In fact nothing has happened. I mean yes, I kissed her tonight but she has never known how I feel."

"Nate, it's okay. I understand. I have met someone too."

"You have?"

"Yeah, I just didn't know how to tell you."

"Well aren't we a pair?"

They both chuckled.

"Why haven't you told her?"

"Dan."

"Dan doesn't want you with his sister?"

"I don't know. I haven't said anything to him either. I've been trying to fight it."

Vanessa chuckled once again. "Nate, if you feel this strongly for her there is nothing to fight. You have to tell her."

"I know. But I need to talk to Dan first. I don't want to mess up our friendship."

"I think you are going to be surprised about his reaction."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

He brought Vanessa into his arms and hugged her. "Now go get her Nate Archibald." she said as she shoved him away.

"You sure you are going to be okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

He smiled at her and left.

Walking home his mind went over and over their kiss. He sure hopes Jenny feels the same for him.

"Hey man, I figured you would be later then this." Dan said as Nate walked into the door.

"I uh.. Well I need to talk to you about something."

"Sounds serious." Dan said as he sat down on the couch.

"It could be."

"Wow, you are starting to scare me." Dan said chuckling.

"Vanessa and I broke up."

"I'm sorry man."

"It was mutual. We both fell in love with other people."

"Wow, didn't see that coming." Dan said.

"The thing is I don't want to lose your friendship."

"Why would you lose my friendship?" Dan asked.

"Well, um.. see the person I fell in love with is ..."

"Jenny?" Dan asked.

Nate looked up at Dan trying to figure out if this made Dan angry. "Yeah."

"You two were secretly dating?" Dan asked.

"NO, no. I've gotten to know her living here and all and well I tried my best not to have these feelings since she is your sister but I can't fight it anymore."

Dan was quiet for a long time and Nate waited for him to say something.

"Does Jenny know this?" Dan finally asked.

"I don't know. I mean I've never told her but I did.. well I did kiss her tonight."

"Wow." Dan said.

"I understand if you want me to move out." Nate said as he started getting his things together.

"What are you doing?" Dan asked.

"I didn't figure you would want me here anymore."

"Nate, you are my friend and yes Jenny is my sister, but I don't tell her who to date and she doesn't tell me. If Jenny wants to date you I'm fine with it. I know you will treat her good. That's all I ask of you."

Nate looked at Dan and finally broke into a smile.

"I can't believe you were afraid to tell me." Dan said.

"Well now I need to find out how Jenny feels about me."

"Well I think you are going to be surprised." Dan said chuckling.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm not saying."

"Tell me. Please."

"You will probably find out tomorrow." Dan said laughing now.

"You are an ass." Nate said.

"Hey don't call your future brother in law an ass." Dan said walking off leaving Nate stunned.


End file.
